Blame: Assign responsibility for a fault or wrong, condemn, accuse, assign liability, indict, incriminate.

We are all living on this very Earth because of our mothers. Every. Single. One. Of. Us.

I know that can be hard to remember when it has taken until 2018 for the care standards to be adjusted to include the vulnerable days and weeks following delivery, but it’s true. It’s also true that many women prioritize the needs of those we care about, or sometimes others we’ve never met, over our own.

It is through this constant state of deferment that many women who struggle with mental illness not only suppress their emotions and opt out of the help they would like, but they’re also assigned responsibility for the external symptoms of their inner struggle.

This adds blame into the equation and inappropriately places responsibility on someone in need, without providing any attempt to identify or address the root cause.

It’s easy to provide empty words of affirmation like, “look on the bright side,” but for the 43.7 million Americans who struggle with mental health illnesses annually, these aphorisms exacerbate their inability to see it through, as much as they might like. Now, in addition to the feelings of depression or anxiety, someone else has augmented the already existent and very real internal voice that this is somehow their own fault.

Stigma: Shame, disgrace, dishonor, ignominy, opprobrium, humiliation, and (bad) reputation.

There’s a reason why it’s not acceptable to say “you’re just having a bad day” when you break your arm.

Former FLOTUS Michelle Obama said, “at the root of this dilemma is the way we view mental health in this country. Whether an illness affects your heart, your leg or your brain, it’s still an illness, and there should be no distinction.”

Mental and emotional health are just as important to our wellbeing and ability to be the best parents we can be as our physical health, but the stigma we’ve placed on those who live with mental illnesses prevent many from seeking the help they may need or even the help they desire. That’s at least 8.7 million people, according to the American Medical Association, who need treatment that will not receive it.

That’s like the entire population of the state of Nevada, Utah, and Iowa combined breaking their leg and then “looking on the bright side.”

Live openly, live consciously. Choose your words wisely and own up to your misspoken words. Think about how what you’re saying might affect someone else. You never know who might be listening, who overheard your remarks, or how big of an impact your words might have on another precious soul, sharing the same space you’re in. Encourage equality. Show compassion. Choose empowerment. Be honest. Educate.

Guilt: The fact of having committed a specified or implied offense or crime, wrongdoing, wrong, criminality, misconduct, sin.

I believe that guilt is one of the strongest, most insidious forces known to man.

Women are told we’re too emotional. I don’t think we’re emotional enough.

Is it really such a bad thing to wear our hearts on our sleeves? If we cannot openly share our feelings, especially as mothers, how can we expect our children to be emotionally intelligent?

We’re all taught to be tough. “Tough it out,” we’re told from a young age.

Well, being tough does not cure cancer. It does not prevent a heart attack from occurring. Nor does it improve our mental and emotional wellbeing. This inaccurate association of mental and emotional illness with weakness is what leads so many to missing the care and attention they need and deserve. Too many of us, too often, alienate ourselves for fear of disappointment, rejection, and judgment.

Ironically, those struggling with mental and emotional illnesses while fighting through to take care of their families are some of the toughest, strongest, and most emotionally intelligent people – err, mothers – you’ll ever meet.

If we cannot express our emotional health with honesty, vulnerability, and wisdom, the fear of appearing weak and powerless will continue to take over our hearts, our souls, and our families.

As mothers, it is more important for us to support one another, than it is to worry about meal planning. After all, we’re the only ones who truly know what it takes to cope with the changes our bodies endure, hormonal surges, hemorrhoids and hair loss, sleep deprivation, and many other highs and lows that originate with motherhood.

If you are struggling, please remember that you are not alone. It is perfectly okay to not be okay. Listen to yourself, and don’t hesitate to seek the help you desire, speak about the help you desire, and embrace the help you deserve.

“Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of, but stigma and bias shame us all.” – Bill Clinton

Happy Mother’s Day Month, Mamas! 

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Have you been to the Reno River Festival in recent years? It is amazing to me how this festival has grown and changed since it started 14 years ago.

How do I know it was 14 years ago? Because I vividly remember working the inaugural event the weekend that my husband proposed to me. But that’s besides the point.

This event has really grown from it’s whitewater kayaking roots to have truly something for everyone.

I’m super excited to do the Reno River Roll with my son for the first time this year, a moving concert that celebrates everything bicycle. Then afterwards, we’ll take in some of the bands that will be playing at Wingfield Park (see the schedule below) and watch the whitewater kayak and SUP competitions.

There is also a Mother-Daughter lookalike contest… I thought about participating, but my husband and daughter say that my daughter looks NOTHING like me. Whatever. Maybe you can enter, though!

And for you fellow yogis, the only thing better than a weekend yoga class is a FREE OUTDOOR yoga class! Make that two — there is one each day of the Reno River Festival (see the schedule below).

They always have awesome vendors to peruse as well in the Smuggler’s Village. And the adults in your group can enjoy the Summer Wine Village or the Craft Beer Village.

My kids love the Reno-Tahoe Adventure Park, which features a zip line over the river. I mean seriously, HOW COOL IS THAT?!

The weather is forecasted to be gorgeous, and I encourage you to grab the family and head outside to see all of the awesome music, culture and athleticism that will be on display at the Reno River Festival.

We are super excited that Dolan Automotive Group, a sponsor of both Reno Moms Blog and the Reno River Festival, has offered up two family four packs to this Saturday’s Reno River Roll. Enter on our Facebook page to win!

Here is the schedule for the entire weekend!

Saturday, May 12:

General Festival Hours:

9am – 6pm – Expo Hours

9am – 5pm – Bike Valet Hours

10am – 5pm – The Adventure Park Hours

10am – 6pm – Private Cabana Hours

11am – 5pm – Craft Beer Village & Limited Release Tent Hours

11am – 8pm – The Wild Tonic Summer Wine Village Hours

8am – 11am – Reno River Roll Check In

Event Schedule:

9am -10am – Yoga in the Park (The Yoga Studio)

11:30am – Reno River Roll Begins on the under the Reno Arch featuring The Island of Black and White, Coors Light Girls Bike Team, Tour de Dez and a lot more

12:30pm – Smithfield Celebrity Chef Cooking Demonstration (main stage)

2:45pm – Reno River Roll Costume Contest on Wingfield Park Amphitheater (main stage)

Music Festival Hours: 

10:30am – 12:15pm – Opening Act: Fresh Makers

1:15pm – 2:45pm – Act 2: Jessie Leigh

3:30pm – 5:00pm – HEADLINER: Jimmie Allen

5:15pm – 8:00pm – Act 4: Island of Black & White

Whitewater Event Schedule: 

10am – Noon – Great Basin Orthopedic’s White Water Freestyle Prelims

12:30pm – 2pm – SUP Surf Competition

3:30pm – 4:30pm – Great Basin Orthopedic’s Freestyle Kayaking Semi-Finals

All Day – Slalom Warm-up

Freestyle Divisions:
Men’s
Women’s
OC1
C1
Junior Men (14-18)
Junior Women (14-18)

Sunday, May 13 (aka MOTHER’S DAY!)

General River Festival Hours:

9am – 6pm – Expo Hours (More than 100 shops perfect for Mother’s Day)

10am – 5pm – The Adventure Park Hours

10am – 6pm – Private Cabana Hours

11am – 4pm – Craft Beer Village & Experience Hours

11am – 5pm – The Wild Tonic Summer Wine Village Hours

Schedule of Events:

9am -10am – Yoga in the Park (The Yoga Studio)

Noon – Mother Daughter Look Alike Contest (main stage)

6pm – Whitewater Championship Awards

Music Festival Schedule:

10:30am – 12:00pm – Opening Act: Nate Botsford

1:00pm – 2:30pm – Act 2: Hit Parade

3:00pm – 4:30pm – Headliner: Brewer’s Grade

4:45pm – 6:00pm – Act 4: Keyser Soze

Whitewater Event Schedule:

0am – Noon – Slalom Kayak and SUP

1:00pm – 3:00pm – BoaterCross and SUPcross

3:30pm – 4:30pm – Great Basin Orthopedic’s Freestyle Kayak Finals

6pm – Freestyle Awards Ceremony

Freestyle Divisions:
Men’s
Women’s
OC1
C1
Junior Men (14-18)
Junior Women (14-18)

Slalom Divisions:
Men’s
Women’s

Boatercross Divisions:
Cadets (Under 14)
Junior Men (14-18)
Junior Women (14-18)
Men’s
Women’s

SUP-Class Divisions:
Men’s
Women’s

This post is sponsored by Dolan Auto Group.

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Life as a parent can get hectic. If you’re anything like me, I usually feel like I’m struggling to keep my head above water most days, and by the time the weekend rolls around, I often dream about going to bed early with a good book instead of going out and hitting the town.

Sometimes on a Friday night, I’ll look across the room at my husband and think about what our weekends used to look like. When we met, he was a drummer in a band, so our weekends were filled with going to his gigs and dancing when the band took a break, and staying out until the wee hours of the morning. Our weekend days were spent hiking with our three dogs or skiing.

Needless to say, things have changed for us now that we have two kids.

It’s important to carve out time for you and your significant other to get out and just spend time together. But after 13 years of marriage, our ideas have become stale. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve spent an hour discussing what we could do just to end up staying home. Or doing the same date over and over.

That’s why I reached out to my network of Reno Moms, who provided the below suggestions for when you just can’t handle one more outing of dinner and a movie.

Game Night:

Bundox Bocce: Bundox Bocce, located in what was once the casino floor, is a 22,000-square-foot indoor/outdoor facility complete with seven indoor bocce courts, two regulation length outdoor bocce courts, nine skee-ball machines, a shuffleboard table, ping pong, dart boards and full bar with unique menu items and plenty of comfortable seating throughout. The space also includes eight big screen TVs, large format projection, outdoor patio seating. They also have really healthy and high quality food and a great drink selection. I highly recommend you reserve a court in advance! https://www.bundoxbocce.com/info/

Escape Games: Probably best if you can gather several couples, as you reserve a room in advance. Come with friends, family or co-workers for 60 minutes of brain teasing fun and challenges. You and your team will be locked in one of our four rooms and be given a mission. You have one hour to find your way through different levels of hints and attempt an ESCAPE!

https://www.breakthroughreno.com/

https://www.puzzleroomreno.com/

https://www.keyandcode.com/

https://www.brainyactzescaperooms.com/reno-nv/

Grand Sierra Resort: From the aqua range to laser tag, an arcade and bowling, you can relive your youth and play all night long. Bring a swimsuit and pay the local’s drop in fee for their newly remodeled pool. https://www.grandsierraresort.com

Mini-Golf: There’s nothing like a throw back to your youth with a game of mini-golf. Check out Magic Carpet Golf – you know you’ve driven by it on South Virginia street looking at its unique hole features! http://www.magiccarpetgolfreno.com/

Need 4 Speed: Finally determine who is the better driver in your family with some high speed indoor kart racing! https://www.need2speed.com/

Press Start: This is Reno’s “raddest bar & arcade servicing Midtown’s largest rotating selection of arcade games, craft beer and pinball.” http://pstart.net/

Wasting Arrows: Put a little Hunger Games flavor into your date night with some archery at Wasting Arrows! http://wastingarrows.com/

Anything VR: Did you even know we have a Virtual Reality arcade here in Reno?! Jump into the middle of the action, whether you are fighting for your life and freedom or exploring new words. https://anything-virtual.com/

Outdoorsy:

Beach It: Pack a picnic and head up to Tahoe for a sunset dinner. You’ll never be left disappointed.

Base Camp: What could be more fun than climbing up the side of a building downtown?! http://whitneypeakhotel.com/climbing/

Go for a hike, take a picnic dinner: https://www.visitrenotahoe.com/things-to-do/outdoor-activities/hiking/

Shows:

Go for a casino show: So much more entertaining and engaging than a movie. The Eldorado Showroom has a great variety of shows! https://www.eldoradoreno.com/entertainment/shows

Circus Circus Midway: Hit the midway and enjoy regular circus act performances. https://www.circuscircus.com/content/dam/MGM/circus-circus-las-vegas/entertainment/circus-circus-midway-act-schedule.pdf

Pioneer Underground: http://pioneercenter.com/

Relaxation:

David Walley’s Resort: Get a day pass and then have dinner and hit the historic Genoa bar. http://www.davidwalleys-resort.com/

Steamboat Hot Springs: Get a massage and book a private hot tub room. http://steamboatsprings.org/

Book a spa day at a local spa! This might be a better idea if you can do it during the week, but book a treatment and stay for hours in luxurious relaxation! My favorite is the Atlantis spa, but remember the local’s discount is only Monday through Thursday! https://www.atlantiscasino.com/spa

Sports:

Depending on the season and your interests, check out the Reno Aces, Bighorns or Reno 1868 FC. Regardless of the sports, the bars just outside the ballpark often have great bands playing on an outdoor stage. http://greaternevadafield.com/

Batting cages: Take a swing at some fun at the many local batting cage options!

Restaurants and bars: 

Bistro 7: Another great South Reno location, the food is centered on it’s wood oven, with fare like Miso Crusted Sea Bass, local free-range deviled eggs, steaks, seafood and wood-fired pizzas. http://bistro7reno.com/

Brasserie St. James: Brasserie Saint James is an old world style craft brewery and restaurant, opened in an historic Crystal Springs Ice and Water building in Reno, NV.  https://www.brasseriesaintjames.com/

Bricks: This is a traditional Reno restaurant with a new outdoor courtyard patio. http://www.bricksrestaurant.com/

Campo: This is a popular restaurant, so reservations are highly recommended. http://camporeno.com/

Centro: Get adventurous with some bone marrow, quail or octopus! http://www.centroreno.com/

FEAST Reno: Specializing in classic dishes with modern twists, you’ll always experience something new here. http://www.feastreno.com/#home

Great Full Gardens: If you like healthy and locally sourced food, check out the South Reno location! http://greatfullgardens.com/great-full-gardens-south

La Vecchia: Don’t miss their Ravioli Mondays! https://www.lavecchiareno.com/

La Fondue: Take a drive up the mountain to enjoy fondue in Incline Village. You could even hit the beach while you’re up there! http://www.tahoefondue.com/

Poncho and Willies: Inside Western Village, this is an upscale Mexican restaurant with a beautiful b ar offering dozens of imported tequilas and beers. https://www.westernvillagesparks.com/dining/pancho-and-willies

Louis Basque: This Basque restaurant is a Reno tradition, and with family style seating, you’re bound to meet some interesting new people. http://louisbasquecorner.com/

Lucky Beaver: It’s a sports bar with a twist, where they have exhibition kitchens. They’re known for high quality and world-famous food, so not your typical sports bar grub! http://www.luckybeaver.com/

South Creek Pizza: You want authentic Italian pizza? These owners brought in a pizza oven from Italy! It’s the closest to Naples style pizza you’ll get in Reno! https://www.southcreekpizza.com/

The Depot: Located in the former headquarters for the Nevada-California-Oregon Railway built in 1920, this establishment is full of charm with fabulous food and drink. Plus, in the summer they have an outdoor area with cornhole!

Twisted Fork: If you want to stay in South Reno, this is such a great spot. The food is amazing, and they have a lovely area for outdoor dining. http://twistedforkreno.com/

Wild River Grille: Every Monday, you can have dinner with your dog, and with their on-river location, you can enjoy a lovely walk along the river afterwards! https://www.wildrivergrille.com/

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I wrote a blog post a few months ago about the parent’s role in preparing their children for an upcoming dental visit. Today I will talk about the philosophy in our office about the role parents play during their child’s dental visit. We do not have a policy in our office that restricts parents from being with their child during their visits. We strongly encourage parents to be present during cleanings and exams. We feel parents play an extremely important role in their child’s oral health habits at home. During the cleaning and exam, we can discuss prevention and also discuss the current health of your child’s mouth. When parents are present, we can point out any problem areas or provide suggestions about how to better clean your child’s teeth. The exam is also a time to address any questions or concerns the patient or parent might have.

However; if your child requires dental treatment such as fillings or extractions, it is our experience that children do better when they have some separation from their parents. As a mother, I know my children behave differently for their teachers, coaches and other parents than they do for me. I also know as a mother that I want to be there for my children, and I want to support them through any unfamiliar situation. For these reasons, I like parents to be close enough that they can see their child but give enough distance that their child can focus on the dentist.

When we are performing dental treatments, we want 100 percent of our focus to be on the patient. At times, even the most well-intentioned parents can become a distraction to the assistant or the dentist, and we find ourselves splitting our focus between managing the parent and the patient. Furthermore, for a child to be able to listen well, only one person should be talking to them. If they are being given directions by a parent and the dentist, not only will they be overwhelmed, they most likely will listen to the more familiar voice of the parent. If parents are close by, we ask that they are “quiet observers.”

We are also very careful about word choice. We have many kid-friendly words we use to describe a procedure to a child. Our language is positive, and we speak calmly. Parents oftentimes have anxiety from their own experiences, and children are very perceptive to this. I have found that dental treatment on children is usually harder for the parent than the child. Many times, I have had parents thank me after treatment for allowing them to step away.

Another reason for parental separation can be the safety of the parent. Observing dental treatment can make some parents nauseated or even faint.

When working with children, we know there are exceptions, and we must be willing to adapt to the situation and needs of the child. There are certain children who will have a better experience if the parents are with them throughout the visit. The need for parental presence should be discussed between the dentist and parent and decided on a case-by-case basis. Providing the best experience for the child in the safest environment possible is always the priority.

Dr. Nicole Stoker is a pediatric dentist for The Smile Shop and is a mother of two. 

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Motherhood is an elevated, high calling.

It may not appear that way on the outside looking in, since we often find ourselves in humble places (whether we’re wiping bums, cleaning sticky fingers, breathing deeply amidst our frustrations or moving through difficult feelings of being undervalued or unseen).

My hope is that I can be a part of a community of women who are authentic about motherhood from every angle. If we can be raw, real, vulnerable with one another — what kind of force could we be, in our circles of friends, in our families, our community?

So, what does Motherhood in the raw look like for you?

Being parents in 2018, I think we’re often shooting for the moon, stretching ourselves beyond our limits. But at what cost? I’m all for growing your own garden, making your own detergent, or sewing your own crib sheets (okay, admittedly, I don’t know anyone who’s done that). These are all individually great things, but I think we can overcomplicate what really counts and what truly matters to our children and our families. Are we trying to prove something to ourselves? To someone else? I’ve been challenged with that question lately when I look at what I’m prioritizing in my life.

Here’s what I’d like motherhood in the raw to look like, in my own life:

Being still. Being present. Taking in every detail, breathing in the scent of my babies.

Being hands on. Physically loving and encouraging my children with hugs, kisses, back scratches — on their terms of course.

Less stress. Less complication. More simplicity and more laughter.

It means getting outside of my own head and my agenda for a few moments so I can understand the world from a child’s perspective.

Practicing self-care, so I can be the best version of myself for me  — and them.

Motherhood in the raw. Being real, vulnerable, and honest isn’t easy. This has been a year where I’ve felt exposed and vulnerable myself — but I’m grateful for the circumstances that led me to become more comfortable with being in that position. This is where growth happens — where we can open ourselves up to intimacy in our friendships with other moms, and where our children can get the best of us.

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Northern Nevada offers a host of outdoor opportunities, many of which involve water — ironic in the desert right? As we gear up for the season, it is very important to remember safety is the responsibility of everyone who takes part in swimming activities. Often we direct our concern toward our younger or newer swimmers, but it is essential to recognize that drowning can happen to anyone, and it happens very quickly.

Many different drowning prevention organizations address the ABCDs of water safety, so I would like to offer you a snack-size version of these tips.

“A” is for adult. Adults need to supervise all swimming situations, and designated watchers need to be in place at all backyard pool parties, beach get-togethers or even when attending public pools. That moment when you check your text message can make the difference in a safe child or one who has ventured beyond their depth.

“B” is for barriers and buddies. This is a quick reminder for owners of backyard pools that fences and power-operated pool covers save lives. On the buddies issue, sure, it sounds like the kindergarten field trip, but this really is an important tip — even for you veteran swimmers who like to swim to the buoy at Sand Harbor. Always swim with a buddy.

“C” is for classes. Yes, of course, we want all swimmers to experience swim lessons and exhibit a greater degree of control in the water, but we are also addressing the importance of taking CPR and rescue techniques classes. Remember, being a skilled swimmer does not make a person drown proof; it increases their chance of survival.

“D” is for devices. Keeping your phone handy by the pool is a good idea in case of emergency. This facet of safety also includes keeping Coast Guard-approved flotation devices on hand for non-swimmers or small children and maintaining proper rescue tools such as hooks or life rings by your backyard pool at all times. Point of clarification: Water wings, inner tubes and other inflatables are not authorized flotation devices.

The statistics are disturbing. According to the Centers for Disease Control, “There are an average of 3,536 fatal unintentional drownings (non-boating related) annually in the United States — about ten deaths per day.” Be aware that drowning usually does not create the commotion seen in films; it is silent, without splashing and quicker than one might imagine. With so many water activities to enjoy, make safety a part of your family’s plan for the summer. See you at the pool!

Holly Sprague is the owner of Bridgewater Swim Academy located in Reno. She is the mother of three adult children and a former University of Oregon, Division-1, Pac-12 swimming competitor. She loves the outdoor lifestyle prevalent throughout Northern Nevada and continues to be active in the local running and swimming communities.

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Looking for some fun and inexpensive ways to hang with the kiddos this summer? Look no further! Here’s a sampling of some of the free and frugal summer activities you can expect this year. Do you see something missing? Let us know in the comments!

Kids Bowl Free: This year, only High Sierra Lanes is participating in the Kids Bowl Free Program (plus Carson Lanes if you’re in Carson). Every weekday from noon-4, kids can get two free games of bowling — EVERY DAY ALL SUMMER! You do need to rent shoes, but this is a huge savings for some great (nice and cool) indoor fun.

Cinemark $1 Movies: Looks like we’ve lost a few movie theater options this year, but fortunately, the Summit Cinemark theater is hosting the Summer Movie Clubhouse movies this year! At 9 a.m. on Mondays and Thursdays, you can gain entry to select movies for just $1. These movies are filled with children, so they’re a perfect opportunity to take your kids to the theater without too much stress if they make a little noise.

Home Depot Kids Workshops: Type in your zip code to find your local store. Kids building workshops are offered once a month at most locations. They are completely free, and kids get to take home their creations.

Barnes & Noble Summer Reading Program: Sign up for Barnes & Noble’s summer reading program, fill out your reading journal with at least eight books, bring it in, and receive a free book. It’s a perfect way to keep kids reading and get something new at the end of the summer, too!

Hot August Nights: Would your kids enjoy looking at old cars? Hot August Nights is happening from August 7th-12th this year. Totally free to check things out on a hot summer evening!

Lazy 5 Water Splash Park: Head out towards Spanish Springs for the Melio Gaspari Splash Pad. With awesome water features and no standing pools of water, this is a great option for younger children. It’s also only $3/person (ages 2 & under are free), and punch passes are available.

North Valley’s Water Splash Park: Similar to Lazy 5 (though I’ve heard this one is bigger/has more features for bigger kiddos), North Valley offers a splash pad as well. Again, no standing pools of water makes this park a great option for stress-free play. $3/child, 2 & under are free, and punch passes are available.

Legends Mall Splash Pad: Want a quick and easy (and totally free) splash pad option? Head to the Outlets at Legends! There is a really great water feature in the center of the mall with water splashing up and over big rocks. There are benches surrounding the area so you can sit and watch the kids play. Bring a towel and have some fun on a hot day!

Kids Triathlons: My daughter did one of these area triathlons last year, and it was a great experience. This one is for the one Bower’s Mansion triathlon, though Carson City and Reno both have one, too (Sparks’ already passed). Cost is $35 for the event, and there are options for children ages 4-15. Kids receive a finisher’s medal, a shirt, and some other swag, too.

Young Shakespeare at Tahoe: Young Shakespeare at Tahoe is a free event for children designed especially for younger viewers. While the event is free, donations are accepted, and reservations are required via their website. Find dates, show times, and more info HERE.

Junior Naturalist Program: This totally free program offers a monthly nature-focussed hike through the Truckee Meadows Park Foundation. Find more details for locations and meet-ups on their website.

Free Fishing Day: This year’s free fishing day is on June 9th. On this day, adults and children may fish in any public fishing water in the state without getting a fishing license.

Free Fishing Event at Sparks Marina: In addition to the overall Free Fishing Day in Nevada, from 7 a.m. – noon on June 9th, you can take the kids to the Sparks Marina for a free fishing day event. Every child receives a free fishing pole and a free shirt at the event. There will be representatives from the Sparks Fire Department, Police Department, Sheriff’s Department, and Coast Guard. A special section of the marina will be stocked with more than 4,000 fish for the kids to go fishing!

Sparks Heritage Museum and Cultural Center: Visit the downtown Sparks area to explore some of the city’s history. With artifacts and displays and galleries, you’ll learn a lot about Sparks’ history. Across the street is the authentic steam locomotive, a cupola caboose, and a Pullman executive car. In addition, the Glendale Schoolhouse (a nationally registered historic schoolhouse) is Nevada’s oldest school! Cost is $5 for ages 12+, and free for 11 and under. Find details for business hours in the Sparks recreation catalog.

Artown: Artown is back! With concerts, performances, events, sculptures, and more, Artown has a little something for everyone. To find the full event schedule, check out their website HERE.

Summer Concerts & Watermelon on the Quad: Did you know these were voted one of RGJ’s “best family outings”? These free concerts happen every Wednesday evening from 6-8 p.m. at UNR.

Discovery Museum: For about $100/year, your entire family can visit the Discovery Museum whenever you want. Whether it’s the hot summer months when you need to get out of the house but stay cool, or the winter months when the kids need to get some energy out, this place is the place to be! Wednesday mornings you can also gain early admission for “Small Wonders Wednesdays” for the under-5 crowd!

Apple Store Kids Hours: Did you know the Apple Store offers a variety of Kids Hour classes? From how to code, to how to create your own videos, older kids can sign up for a variety of free classes.

Apple Camp: My kids loved Apple Camp last year. Each camp is three days a week for 90 minutes each. The kids receive a free shirt, and parents do need to stay at the store (not a drop off camp). Last year my kids learned how to use iMovie and created their own movie trailers during the week. These classes fill up INSANELY fast once the times/dates are released. I suggest you get on the notification list HERE and register immediately once the classes are announced (some were filled up within 30 minutes of them being released last year).

Sparks Marina: The Sparks Marina is a wonderful place to escape for a few hours. With a 2-mile walking trail around the marina (run, walk, ride a bike/scooter), a coffee shop, park, dog park, a beach for swimming, beach volleyball courts, and more, it’s a fun place for the whole family.

Local Libraries: Nearly all of our local libraries host story times for toddlers and preschoolers. These are totally free, interactive, and lots of fun! Not to mention it’s a nice, cool place to escape the hot summer sun. Check the calendar for your local library, as they usually host free family movies nights, events, and other fun classes, too!

Reno Philharmonic American Salute Concert: This free family concert put on by the Reno Philharmonic on Wednesday, July 4th at Wingfield Park is an event for the whole family. The park opens at 5 p.m. for you to grab a spot on the grass, and the concert starts at 7:30 p.m.

Barnes & Noble Kids Activities: Check out the calendar for our local Barnes & Noble Kids’ Activities. There are often story times, craft times, and activity times for children, all free of charge. View our local store calendar HERE.

Food Truck Fridays: Food Truck Fridays has launched back up for the summer! Take a night off from cooking and eat out at Idlewild on Friday nights this summer. With live music, rock-climbing walls and more, the whole family will enjoy a night out on the grass at the park.

Reno Sculpture Fest: This event, happening on July 14-16, is a fun one for the whole family to head outside and explore. The exact details will be listed on their website soon. Some of the past years’ sculptures were absolutely incredible!

Farmer’s Markets: It’s nearly Farmer’s Market time! I love strolling through farmer’s markets, checking out the stands, buying some fresh fruit, and talking to local farmers. Sometimes I don’t even buy anything, but it’s so fun to walk around with the kids!

Scheels: Don’t ask why, but we end up taking our kids to Scheels at least twice a month. They LOVE it. While you’re there, you can play on the free play structure in the kids’ section, look at the fresh and saltwater fish tanks, take a ride on the ferris wheels, try a free sample of fudge, play a game of bowling, visit the shooting gallery, check out all the talking presidents, and more. Buy a scoop of gelato, and then step out the back side of the store to enter the Outlets at Legends mall and play in the water splash pad.

The Nurturing Nest: If you have children on the younger end, you may want to check out The Nurturing Nest’s calendar. With some free play times just for toddlers, you can beat the heat while your little ones play, and you might even meet some new mom-friends for yourself!

High Sierra Gymnastics: Every Wednesday and Thursday, your 0- to 5-year-olds can drop into preschool open gym at High Sierra Gymnastics for just $5. Let your kiddos run around, tumble and have fun indoors!

Stewart Indian School Father’s Day Pow Wow: If you are looking for a unique activity to do for Father’s Day weekend, this event in Carson City at the Stewart Indian School looks amazing. Entry is totally free, and this is a fabulous way to experience American Indian heritage, history, and pride. A variety of vendors will be there, as well as raffles, arts & crafts, and competition dancing.

Last Friday in Downtown Sparks: On the last Friday of the month from May through September, you can view the museum, tour the train and the Glendale Schoolhouse for free from 5-10 p.m. You can even stay up late for a free movie in the amphitheater for the kids. Vendor booths, local music, and entertainment will be happening until 7 p.m.

Stars & Stripes Honor March: Head to the Sparks Marina on May 28th from 8-11 a.m. for the 2nd annual honor march. This march/walk around the marina will benefit the Nevada Veterans Memorial Plaza.

39 North Marketplace: Thursdays in June, July, and some August dates are included in the 39 North Marketplace. You’ll find farm-fresh food, local vendors, live music and dancing, activities for kids, and more at these events in downtown Sparks.

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Twelve years ago, shortly after I got married, I stumbled across cardio kickboxing classes at my local gym. I fell in love with the movements and the inherent “fun” aspect of this group class. The instructor, Verna, quickly become one of the highlights of the class. She was fun, encouraging, and made you feel that even if you were terrible at something, you were still kicking butt. Within a few months, I was totally addicted and told my husband that someday I would like to teach cardio kickboxing, too.

A few years later, I started having babies — four of them in six years, to be exact. And my dream of teaching cardio kickboxing fell to the wayside. I was busy raising humans, homeschooling, writing for my own blog and others, and running a music business. Classes, licensing, and teaching had no space in my life, and so I more or less just put the dream out of my mind.

In 2016 I began training at mixed martial arts. I fell in love. I constantly say that it was the best adult decision I’ve ever made for myself. I have consistently taken 8-10 classes/lessons a week for an entire year, and it never gets old or boring. As a natural extension, this summer I started to re-dream my old dream. But this time, I took it a step further and started to pursue it.

It’s not that life is any less crazy or full, but my kids are bigger and I’m pretty good at time-management and felt that with a few changes, I could easily fit this into my life now. With bigger kids comes more sleep at night and an easier time navigating what to do with them while teaching — both things that got in the way of me doing this sooner.

It’s weird to chase a dream that developed before I had kids. It’s odd to think that these little humans weren’t in my life when I first thought about doing this, but now they are and I’m finding ways to do it while raising them. It was a complete “me” dream — not a “mom” dream. THAT was a first for me.

This summer I set out to compare group fitness certifications, and eventually decided on one and got to work. I studied every chance I got, and by the end of the summer, I had my certificate and was ready to go.

I started with volunteering to teach cardio kickboxing to the mommas at my homeschool co-op who are not working in a class during sessions. We parked ourselves in the nursery with all their little babies and got to exercising (and occasionally chasing babies around). I felt so energized finally doing something I’d dreamed of for 12 years!

In October, I began teaching a couple classes a week at my martial arts studio. To FINALLY realize my dream has been a huge accomplishment for me. Four years ago, I honestly thought I would never do it. It’s so fun and fulfilling to see a personal dream come full circle into fruition.

If you are a momma in the thick of raising little babies with dreams of your own still, don’t give up! Some dreams take a little bit longer and have some human-raising detours, but you can do it!

Do you have any pre-baby dreams or goals that you’d like to get back to someday? Share them with us in the comments!

Side note: Want to join me for cardio kickboxing? I’d love to have you and will give you your first class for free! I currently teach Monday evenings at 7:00 pm and Thursday mornings at 5:30 am at Momentum Martial Arts at 920 Matley Lane, #6. See you there!

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My daughter recently lost her last baby tooth, which felt like a major milestone. Also, per conversations with our dentist, I knew that it meant she was ready for an Orthodontist consultation. I turned to my network of friends on Facebook for recommendations, and was advised to shop around. I felt like I was about to buy a car!

My first consultation was with Orthodontic Partners, and I was so impressed with what I saw, I cancelled the other appointments. Not only was the South Meadows office super convenient to my house and adjacent to our pediatric dentist, but the staff was knowledgeable, friendly, and the price was honestly lower than I had been preparing myself for.

What I didn’t realize until our appointment is that Orthodontic Partners is a Top 1% provider of Invisalign. That really piqued my interest! After taking photos of my daughter’s teeth, the Orthodontist presented us with our options. I was pretty shocked to learn that my daughter could select braces or Invisalign for the same cost! With the braces, she even had the choice of silver or clear brackets for the same price.

The more the Orthodontist and his assistant told me about Invisalign, I was sold. I had braces when I was a teen, and I vividly remember what a pain it was to floss and how uncomfortable it was after getting my braces tightened. I learned with Invisalign that the process is so gradual that you only really experience soreness when you first start wearing them. It also makes dental hygene a synch! Heck, it made me wonder if I should fine-tune my smile after my teeth have moved over the years.

However, it turned out my daughter had different ideas. Within her peer group, “everyone” had traditional braces and much to my dismay, she was staunchly opposed to the idea of Invisalign (still blows my mind). I figured it was her face, and since it was the same price and she was the one who had to deal with the extra cleaning, I let her choose what she wanted, and she ended up choosing the clear braces.

We had an appointment to get the braces on within a week, and the appointment was remarkably quick. We’re on a payment plan for the next two years, but with an interest free payment plan and insurance footing part of the bill, it was much more financially palatable than I had been expecting all these years. Plus, there is a $1,000 discount for parents to get treatment when they buy services for their child, so heck, I may just have to fine tune my chompers!

My daughter has had a few issues where a wire popped loose and a bracket fell off, but I found that Orthodontic Partners has managed to fit me in the schedule the day of or day after I call to get everything back in working order, and this is all included in the cost we agreed to upfront.

Orthodontic Partners also has an office designed for tweens/teens. There are tablets with video games in the waiting room, TVs above each treatment station, and ice cream pops in the freezer in the lobby to help soothe gums after getting the braces tightened.

Not only that, but as a working mom, I’ve found the wifi in the lobby to be a great way for me to maintain my productivity at work while my daughter is being seen!
When it’s your turn to shop around for an Orthodontist, take this Reno Mom’s recommendation that you should make sure Orthodontic Partners is on your list to get a free consultation!  

This post is sponsored by Orthodontic Partners. 

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I don’t know who came up with the term “Terrible 2s,” because in my personal experience, and based on pretty much every parent I talk to, it really isn’t the 2-year-olds that are the problems — it’s age 3 that’s TOUGH.

I think in my mind, when my oldest was throwing a fit in that 2-year-olds range, it was more of a problem regulating emotions and communicating, whereas at age 3, she is totally manipulating me and it’s on purpose (this isn’t quite true, but it sure feels that way sometimes!!)

So how do you deal with the dreaded threenager? I am not an expert on this topic, and every child is different, but here are some things that are tried and true.

Catch them “being good” — nothing promotes good behavior like positive reinforcement. “My child is never good!” you may be thinking — but it’s the little things, like sharing a snack with a sibling, or listening to you and doing something when you tell them to the first time, that you can give them a quick pat on the back for and tell them “good job!” They look up to you and crave attention, so give it to them when they are doing the right things and over time they will do more of these.

Ignore the minor bad behavior — like a tantrum over brushing teeth. When you repeatedly give more attention to things like tantrums and crying, they learn this is how they get you to attend to them. You need to be prepared that often the crying and tantrums get worse for a short time before they get better, but stay strong momma and BE CONSISTENT. It will get better and stop over time.

Don’t yell — I know it is definitely hard sometimes to maintain your cool when you’ve told your child 15 times to get their shoes on, or eat their dinner, or get in their car seat (my personal pet peeve!!), but try to maintain a calm voice whenever you can, as escalating your emotions can demonstrate to your child that this is how to react when you’re upset about something. The same idea goes with physical punishment.

Contracting — just as with potty training, sometimes having a reward system for good behavior can help. Make a picture chart with whatever it is you want them to do; for example, brush their teeth, make their bed, pick up their toys, etc. Give them a sticker each time they complete the tasks, and then they can earn a reward or one on one time with a parent or whatever you choose.

Choices — at 3 going on 13, children want to feel in control of what is going on. Give your child choices, including the consequences of not completing the tasks requested. For example, “You can go brush your teeth, or you can go to your room and go to bed without a story tonight.”

Timeout — as above, kids crave attention, so removing them from positive attention from you and others, as well as from any possible fun/interaction, helps make an impression for the child. Generally speaking, time out should last 1 minute for each year old they are, and time restarts if they get out without permission.

Here are some web resources as well if you find yourself at your wits end!

• Tips from the American Academy of Family Physicians
• Essentials for Parenting Toddlers and Preschoolers from the CDC
• Parenting Tips from the American Psychological Association

Good luck, and hang in there!!

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As a native Nevadan (fourth generation), I grew up exploring our mountains and the beautiful jewel of water we are so lucky to have in our back yard, Lake Tahoe. My earliest, fondest memories are of swimming in that freezing water, building sand castles, burying my siblings in the sand (and if my dad was feeling up to it, he would let us bury him), learning how to water ski, or being pulled on a tube behind someone’s boat, barbecues, camping, horseback riding — the possibilities were endless!

Anytime I feel like I need some peace, or some nature, I know that in 20 minutes to an hour and a half, I can be in my paradise, the place I feel the most connected to my higher power, the place where my mind can truly be open to possibilities, or closed to the crazy world around me. I have also been taking my boys there since they were only a few months old. There is so much to do for families, whether you are doing a beach day, taking a kid friendly hike, window shopping in the cute little towns all around the lake, or getting some great food at one of the many restaurants!

For the most part, we love doing beach days! We have a few favorites, but this year we wanted to explore a few new locations as well. With 72 miles of shoreline, the options are endless, and it’s so fun to check out all the different offerings — whether you like a rocky beach or the fine sand between your toes. Our top fave is Sand Harbor beach, which is gorgeous and very kid friendly. We love to be on the right side of the beach, where the boat dock is. There are beautiful rock formations and a great view, plus they have the options to rent stand up paddle boards and other fun water toys. Sand Harbor is great during the week if you can swing it, because the weekends get really busy and parking fills up fast! So either get there early in the morning, or try something else, because when the lot is full, there aren’t many options for other parking. Sand Harbor is also home to the Lake Tahoe Shakespeare Festival, a nonprofit organization established for the cultural benefit and enjoyment of all residents and visitors to our region. They strive to plan, produce and advocate the finest cultural events at Lake Tahoe while educating future generations about the importance of including theater, music and art in their everyday lives. This can be an amazing date night, girls night, or they even have offerings for young Shakespeare that is for kiddos! Check out the website: www.laketahoeshakespeare.com.

We also like to go to Kings Beach — more parking, a playground, and the soft sand that reminds me of the ocean. The water here is also shallow for quite a ways out, so the kids love it because they can venture pretty far into the lake, and it’s a little warmer feeling! The town of Kings Beach is also super cute, with great little restaurants and cute mom-and-pop shops! If you want to feel like a local with a little “secret” knowledge, just past Kings Beach is a little beach called Moon Dunes. No entrance fees, great sand, and that shallow water, but also, no bathrooms  — so we haven’t been here in a while due to my boys always needing to GO right when we sit down and set up our little beach area.

If you are closer to the east or south lake area, there are so many options! A popular one is Zephyr Cove, which is also the departure point of the famous M.S. Dixie. They have a restaurant, campgrounds, horse stables, lots of water toy rentals like paddle boards, paddle boats, and jet skis, barbecue areas and a dog beach for your furry family. A little further south of that is Round Hill Beach, which is probably my favorite of that area because they have a pool and a great bar for adult beverages while you sunbathe! If you venture past the casinos and Tahoe Keys, check out Camp Richardson: They have a great restaurant/bar with the famous Rum Runners (careful, these are deceptively strong drinks!), great campgrounds and cabins for rent, cute shops including an ice cream shop, great walking trails and historical buildings, and lots of live music offerings! My parents had their boat here for a few years, and it was awesome because it was a short boat ride to the absolutely gorgeous Emerald Bay!

Speaking of Emerald Bay, if you are into hiking, this is an amazing place to go! There is a 2-mile, round-trip hike complete with a castle. What kid wouldn’t want to see that? Half-hour castle tours are offered all summer long. Here is a great link with some more kid friendly hikes: https://tahoe.com/articles/10-great-lake-tahoe-hikes-kids.

I’m a food lover: I love to cook, I love to eat, and I love to find great local restaurants! There are some
awesome food offerings in Tahoe. I love Garwoods, home of the Wet Woody and located in the gorgeous Carnelian Bay. There I had one of the best brunches I have ever had! Another great one is Sunnyside Restaurant on the west side of Tahoe — amazing fish tacos, you can pull your boat right up to the dock and dine with a beautiful view! If you are near the casinos in South Lake, check out Fire and Ice, a super cool Mongolian-barbecue style restaurant where you build your meal and they cook it on a huge grill in front of you: entertainment and food, plus great cocktails in the beautiful Heavenly village! I mentioned Camp Richardson previously — their restaurant is called The Beacon. They have a more casual offering and also a fine dining option along with their summer music series.

As you can tell, I am a HUGE fan of Tahoe and everything it has to offer. Even living here for all my 35 years, I still find new things to do, and I love doing these things with my family! We are so unbelievably lucky to have this world-famous wonder of Mother Nature so close to us. I honestly think that we will never move out of state because of this magical place that we love so much! If you do get up to explore and play, I encourage you to unplug and really take it all in. The human race is not so kind to this Earth, and we need to do our part to help it out and preserve it for future generations and to truly enjoy it while we can.

Where are some of your favorite Tahoe spots? I’m always looking for more to explore!

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It’s probably something that gets repeated every time you or your child visit the dentist: “Don’t forget to floss every day.”

This is such an important routine to begin as early as when the first two baby teeth are touching; if there is not a wide enough gap for the toothbrush bristles to fit through, it’s time to start flossing.

Cavities can start on any surface of the tooth, but the most common spots are the pits and fissures and the interproximal surfaces (in between the teeth). By eating and drinking healthy, brushing twice a day for the appropriate amount of time (2 minutes) and flossing at least once a day, patients can lower their caries risk and reduce gingivitis.

Which Floss Is Best?

There are many different kinds of floss available today: traditional string floss, super floss (a thicker interwoven thread floss), floss sticks, and water flossers. Parents often ask what the best one is, and the answer is simple: the one you are most like to use consistently and properly. Personally, I’m a fan of traditional floss. It is more difficult for kids to do on their own, so parents may have to help up until about age 10, but it is the most affordable and effective.

Flossing Technique 101

The proper technique for traditional floss is to get approximately 18 inches of floss and wrap it around your middle fingers to create a tight tension, then use your index fingers to slide the floss through the contact, pull the floss against one tooth in a “C” shape and sweep the side of the tooth in an up and down motion (not side to side). Then pull the floss against the other tooth and do the same motion until you have swept every interproximal surface in your mouth. As you floss, unwrap one middle finger and rewrap the other to expose clean floss as you move along.

Floss sticks are a good introduction for kids, but I have found that the floss line develops too much slack and it makes it more difficult to floss tight contacts, especially in the molar areas; so children may think they are flossing, but if the floss does not fully slide through the contact, they are missing critical areas. Also, you have to rinse or wipe clean the floss as you move along.

Water flossers are the new fad, but can be a bit pricey as well as messy. I believe a water flosser is a good adjunct to flossing, especially for children in braces, but it does not fully sweep through the contact like traditional floss. So I still recommend flossing as well and to use floss threaders if the child is in braces.

Flossing is such an integral part of maintaining healthy oral hygiene. If you are having trouble, ask your dentist or hygienist for tips and instruction on how to properly floss your child’s teeth, or what products may be best for you.

Melissa McCool, DDS, is a proud Reno mom and is a pediatric dentist at The Smile Shop.

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“That robin’s been working hard on a nest here, I’ve been watching her for days,” my husband told me as he handed me a cup of coffee one morning in May.

As our family’s de facto lunch-packer, coffee-brewer, and kid’s-breakfast-maker (I’m so lucky), my husband spends a good hour in front of the kitchen window each morning. The window looks directly onto a lush ornamental pear tree in our side yard.

The nest was tucked into a crook where a big branch veered off from the tree trunk. It was protected beautifully from wind and harsh sun and was somewhat disguised from predators’ prying eyes.

On a Sunday in late May, after cautiously looking around for a protective mama bird and not finding her, my husband stealthily reached his phone up over the nest and snapped a quick photo of its contents: three perfect, blue eggs.

As the following week passed, we made frequent checks out the window, watching for babies. We Googled “robin eggs” to learn about the gestation period (12 to 14 days after the egg is laid), the period of time we could expect robins to live in the nest after hatching (about 10 to 15 days after fledgling), and whether we needed to worry about mama robin abandoning the eggs or babies if we were to get too close (not likely, thank goodness).

And on the Wednesday evening after Memorial Day, I tiptoed over to the tree, stood balanced on my toes, and peered over to see if the nest had any activity inside. And to my surprise, I was met with three fuzzy tops of heads. BABIES! There they were, already instinctively waving their opened mouths, blindly (their eyes were still unopened) waiting for their mother to poke food inside their hungry faces.

Meanwhile, as our babies (as we’d come to think of them) were passing their first days in our pear tree, our 9-year-old daughter was doing some important growing herself. We’d bought her a new “big-girl” bike on Memorial Day, and suddenly, in a matter of minutes, she went from struggling to pedal, afraid of hills and reticent to ride, to flying down the hill to her buddy’s house down the hill and around the corner (and out of sight), with barely a wave back to us.

Another evening later that same week, I sat at the dining room table and watched through the sliding glass door as she, with no prompting from us at all, reassembled the patio chairs and their cushions on our deck. The chairs had all been messily strewn for days since the prior weeks’ storm. She meticulously reordered the lounge chairs, gently placing the cushions on top and fluffing them, carefully arranging the little ottoman just so.

“Wow,” I said to myself. “So responsible. So grown up.” Through the glass door, she all of a sudden looked so grown up.

The baby birds finally opened their eyes, and by the first weekend in June, Mama and Papa Robin were taking round-the-clock turns plunging bugs and worms into those tiny, devouring mouths, which were getting bigger by the day. My own mom came that weekend for a visit from California, and we never even turned the TV on once, so consumed were we with the fascinating show going on outside our window. We’d laugh as Mama Robin would plop her butt on top of the fast-growing babies to keep them warm at night, and we marveled at how long and strong their necks had grown in such a short amount of time. Even after she drove home to the Bay Area, my mom would text daily for baby updates: “How are those babies? Do they look like they’ll fly soon?” And, after my report of snake sightings in the area, “Do you think the babies are safe?”

We became extraordinarily, needlessly protective over these babies who were receiving the best possible care from their two capable parents, doing all the things nature had provided for baby birds everywhere, all day, all over the world, since the dawn of time. We went so far as to keep our cat out of the windowsill, after noticing that Mama and Papa seemed to be hovering and hesitating to deliver their worms to the nest and fearing that perhaps our little “predator” had them spooked.

As the next 10 days passed, we began seeing only one gray head alongside mama in the nest. We feared the other two babies had been lost and curse the unknown force — snakes? bats? blue jays? a fall? — that had taken them from us. We worried for poor Mama’s feelings. We were afraid to turn away for a moment for fear we’d miss the big flying lesson that would take her last baby from us all.

When the baby was 10 days old, our daughter complained that her chest hurt.

“You mean, like a cold” my husband asked. “Are you sick?”

“No, it hurts on the outside, like here,” she said, pointing to her breasts.

“Oh,” I said, feeling excited, terrified, and grief-stricken all at once. “I know what that is.”

Fifteen days after I discovered those blind, fuzzy heads in the nest, I stood up from the desk in my home office and stretched, preparing to go to the kitchen and make a glass of iced tea. I took a second to glance out the office window, toward the pear tree. Perched on the fence next to it were two birds: Mama Robin and another one, a gray, fuzzy robin that was almost Mama’s size. And as quick as a wink, that young, gray robin flew, strong and fast, to the fence across the alley from our house. Here he sat for just a moment, under mama’s watchful eye. And then he flew around the corner and out of sight. Mama sat staring in that direction for a long while, and I was mesmerized by her, looking at once forlorn, lonely, strong, and proud.

Days later, I took my daughter to buy her first training bra. I felt like that mama bird, watching as nature was doing its thing, acknowledging that even though I was cheering with her, inside I was thinking how someday, in the future that was coming in the blink of an eye, she would leave my nest, too. And I hoped by then I would have done a good enough job that she’d have wings strong enough to fly.

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I am a sucker for all of the cliche quotes floating around Facebook and Instagram about calm parenting. You’ve probably seen some of them, like: “When little people are overwhelmed by big emotions, it’s our job to share our calm, not join their chaos.” I could go on with so many of these quotes that inspire me to be the mom my children need. (Of course, not the mom I always am).

While these quotes can feel like cliches and can maybe seem a bit overused, there is so much truth packed into those statements. I don’t want my kids remembering me as a frazzled, impatient, crazy lady who can’t seem to keep her cool. I don’t want them wondering, “Am I going to get nice mommy, or grumpy mommy?” Basically, I want to have their trust, and to be a safe person in their lives.

I want them to know they will be loved, no matter what.

BUT, that isn’t always easy to model and put into action, consistently at least. Are you in a difficult phase right now with one or more of your children? The last few weeks, one of my littles has tested every ounce of my patience. Some of his go-to behaviors we’ve seen recently: high-pitched screaming in the middle of a restaurant or grocery store, tantrums that go on for 20 minutes, hitting/scratching his sibling, kicking us in the stomach during diaper changes (Lawd help me) and overall just testing any boundary we put in place.

I have been anything but calm, the last few days in particular. I yelled yesterday, when generally I’m not a yeller. I actually was so frustrated with what felt like constant whining and crying yesterday, that I went in my room (into my closet actually) away from my kids, and stomped my feet. Full disclosure: Totally stomped my feet with all the frustrated energy I had. Literally, who does that? I’m telling you, I felt done this week. I didn’t feel like myself, the way I typically like to handle things. But I was tired, and at the end of my rope. Ever been there? ;

It was so frustrating as a mother — I felt like I wasn’t able to understand my little guy and what his needs were. My first thoughts were:

• Does his schedule need tweaking?
• Is he overtired?
• Are his teeth bothering him?
• Is he ravenously hungry?

All of those things checked off just fine and normal on my list; it’s just been a difficult few weeks of navigating through whatever is going on with him.

I can’t see it now; maybe it’s a growth spurt, or frustration with not being able to explain what’s bothering him. I’m not sure, but what I do know to be true is this: It’s my job as his mother to remain calm. Am I going to do this perfectly each day I wake up? Nope. But that’s the beauty of being a parent. Our kids (if they feel safe with us) will forgive us if we take responsibility each time we mess up — if we show them we are humble enough to own up to our mistakes.

My littlest isn’t quite yet 2, but I still said I was sorry to him the other day when I became frustrated. I knew I had messed up the moment I showed him that I couldn’t handle his emotions/behavior. I remember saying, “I’m sorry I was so frustrated with you earlier and that I yelled. Do you want a hug?” And followed up with, “Do you want to read books with me?” Of course he said yes, and that was all he really needed — my full attention, and my calm.

It’s easy for me to be calm with my kids when they’re being uncomplicated. But the moment there are some difficult or intensified emotions they’re working through, I know I need to take some deep breaths and practice maintaining a calm spirit. I know I need to empathize and see things from their world. I know I need to set limits with love and care. “I know you wanted that toy, but right now it’s brother’s turn to play with it. You can have a turn after he’s done.” It’s sometimes that simple. “I know you’re upset because want to have milk, but right now we’re going to have water.” Calm, even-keeled, genuine empathy for their situation, while still setting limits and not giving in when they really need us to hold a boundary for them.

My favorite illustration that my favorite parenting author (Janet Lansbury) uses in dealing with difficult situations with our children is to imagine as though you’re wearing a superhero cape. A real Superhero shows up to defend and save the protagonist. A real Superhero works to stay calm in a chaotic situation. A real Superhero is a mother who is committed to loving her child through a difficult season, while working to maintain a calm, unruffled spirit. It’s hard to do, but worth getting ourselves the proper tools we need to keep our calm with our kids.

Thanks for reading, Superhero Moms! We are all in this together! What are some tools that help you to remain a Calm Mama?

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Before I get into my review of the KinderReady app, I have to confess something so you know what you’re getting into: I’ve basically been worrying about Ian’s kindergarten readiness since he was, um, born.

Yep. I’m that mom.

You can understand why I jumped at the chance to test out KinderReady.

Designed with a kindergarten teacher, KinderReady provides parents with daily ideas that will help get their children ready for kindergarten for a whole year. It takes the thinking and stressing and Pinterest-ing out of the equation, so parents can focus on the actual activities and experiences with their children. As it says in their app description: The truth is, you don’t need to do anything fancy to get ready for kindergarten. You just need to REMEMBER to do…SOMETHING.

Most of the activities don’t require any additional materials or purchases at all, and the few rare ones that do use items you already have in your household. KinderReady makes it as easy as possible for us parents, whose brain may never fully recover from the months years (let’s be realistic here) of sleep deprivation.

I’ve only used KinderReady for a month but already we’ve covered a variety of subjects and skills, including but not limited to language arts, mathematics, science, social studies, gross and fine motor skills, and social and emotional skills. We looked for letters everywhere we went, counted the number of objects we see, tested if an object will float or sink, played the “no thumbs!” game where we can’t use our thumbs for daily living activities, and made an art project by tearing up magazine pages then gluing them down to make a design. And we’re only one month in!

There is enough variety so that the activities don’t become repetitive, and when we see a familiar one come around (spotting a certain letter), Ian lit up with excitement because he “already knows what to do” and took great joy in explaining it to me! Some days, we can wrap up the activity in a few minutes (the “no thumbs!” game because we basically got nothing done but had lots of laughs) or it can end up being something we did on and off throughout the day (counting the number of objects we see — and this had the bonus of keeping Ian occupied during car rides).

Another nice feature is that the previous activities are available even after the day’s passed, so I can go back and reintroduce certain ones at a later time or use them as games to play while we are waiting. The counting game actually distracted Ian from asking for a candy bar while we waited in the checkout line at the grocery store, because he was too busy counting how many there were on the shelf! Yes!

KinderReady also includes a helpful “Getting Ready” checklist for the first day of school, thereby saving me a dive through Pinterest and/or Google. The list includes social and emotional tips for both the first day and the days leading up to the first day; it is exactly what I needed to read, even though we are more than a year away from Ian starting kindergarten.

And the best part was?

It’s an unexpected confidence boost for me. I’ve been worried that I wasn’t doing enough — a feeling I think most of us are familiar with — and it was nice to have some confirmation that I had been doing a good job teaching Ian. Not to mention I’ve always struggled with how to play with Ian. My husband comes up with space dinosaurs, and my idea of play is practicing phonetics (I did tell you I’m that mom). But now I feel more comfortable during our free play time and more relaxed overall.

KinderReady is truly an app designed for the parents. It is simple to use and sets everyone up for success!

KinderReady was designed with a kindergarten teacher in California to help parents remember to do activities during the day that will help children get ready for kindergarten. Most parents remember to read every day and count every once in a while, but many kids come to class with “holes” in their knowledge. You have a lot to think about besides letter recognition, shapes, colors, and teaching other kindergarten readiness skills. Let us help you with some EASY activities anyone can do! Please keep in mind that all children bloom at different times in different areas. Some activities might be too hard, and some too easy. Feel free to modify them as needed. We know the notifications aren’t rocket science, and it’s not supposed to be! We didn’t want to give you something complicated to figure out. Like parents need that in their busy days! We want to give daily REMINDERS to do SIMPLE things to help kindergarten be more successful for you and your child. This app will provide a year’s worth of notifications that promote language arts, math, social studies, arts, science, social and emotional learning, and fine and gross motor skills. We suggest doing these activities more than once. 

Requires iOS 9.0 or later. Compatible with iPhone, iPad, and iPod touch.

For more information,visit their Facebook page. 

Already have a child who is beyond KinderReady? Check out KinderQuizzes — this app contains quizzes for kindergarteners and first graders in language arts, mathematics, science, social studies, the arts, sports, foreign language and more! Many are aligned with the common core standards. 

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We all strive to be the best parents we can be. What does “the best parents we can be” really mean, though? It’s easy to want to compare ourselves to friends or family who have been through the early stages of parenthood before, but how many of us take the time to understand where their instincts come from? For many of us, the foundations of our parenthood journey begin much earlier than we might think.

As children, we play amusing games like M.A.S.H., which help present all the possibilities we consider for our futures. You may get lucky and draw the mansion, or you may find yourself in the harsh reality of living in a shack when you grow up. We imagine ourselves in these best- and worst-case scenarios, forming some of our earliest opinions of the type of life we want to lead.

Fast forward to adulthood, where some of us continue to recreate our own version of these games to help plan for the milestones ahead. As we decide to begin growing our families, we jump through hoops trying to conceive. And those of us who are fortunate enough to be able to, endure all that pregnancy has to offer. Then suddenly, ready or not, boom: You’re a parent! As such, you’re suddenly entirely responsible for another human being’s life and well-being — maybe even writing articles for local publications in the middle of your second night exploring the wonders of sleep training, and an immense Cry It Out fit.

Hypothetically.

Once you become a parent, your perspective changes drastically. And as much as we try to be prepared for our futures, it’s fiercely true what they say: You have no idea what parenthood is like until you experience it. And as soon as you think you have one thing figured out, everything changes.

This may be astonishing to you, but children do not come with an instruction manual. My husband and I worked with an incredible local doula, certified lactation consultant, certified sleep professional, attended nearly every infant care, new parenting, and birthing class imaginable. I belong to several different mommy support groups and did enough research throughout my pregnancy to write a dissertation; yet five months in, we are regularly confronted with new situations that we have not prepared for. I think that’s why babies conveniently cannot form memories until at least 3 months of age: They may not come with an instruction manual, but they do have a built-in grace period to let you get your bearings. It’s vital, especially as new parents, to take in each experience as it comes with an open heart, to always aim to be where your feet are, and to enjoy the moments that are given to us.

We should try to remember that we’re all doing the best we can, and that’s enough. That we’re enough. Every journey to parenthood is unique, just like every child is unique. While we may not all have the same approach, we all have the same goal: to provide the very best life possible for ourselves and our children.

And, lucky for us, a new study has documented that it’s at about age 7 when our earliest memories begin to fade, a phenomenon known as “childhood amnesia.” So, my fellow mamas and papas, we’ve got this. We all make mistakes, but these mistakes are what form the foundation of those “instincts” we see in our friends, family and fellow parents. What is most important is to learn from our mistakes. Share them — celebrate them, even.

As much as I’ve tried to find them, there are no words that can capture the magic in our son’s smile and how it makes me feel. And in the moments when I feel completely overwhelmed, when he has tears streaming down his cheeks or his piercing shrieks are echoing through our home, I take a moment to step back and recognize and remind myself that this season of life grows shorter and shorter each day.

These loud moments are reminders of how alive, how independent, how resilient children are.
And before long, the screaming will stop and the stresses and messes our littles create will be replaced with the memories of their first full-body, gummy smiles, and the art pieces that decorate our walls.

Our numbered days are much more enjoyable when we have an open mind and give one another the patience, support, the benefit of the doubt, and the grace to navigate through this journey.

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Recently, my mini van was in the body shop after I was backed into at school pick-up. I had a rental car for about two weeks, and it was a very nice little SUV, definitely worked for that time, but oh how I missed my van! I kept forgetting to open the doors to get my kids out…kept reaching up to open the lift gate with a button…you mean I actually have to get out and use a handle?

In the past, I was always very adamant that I would NEVER be the mini van mom: No way in hell would I jeopardize my cool factor and give in to the mommy van club! When we had our first son, I drove a Ford Focus, and it was such a pain in the ass with a car seat. I was so excited to upgrade to an SUV — absolutely loved my Hyundai Sante Fe! It was zippy, had way more room than my tiny Focus, and drove awesome in the winter weather.

Enter kid #2, another car seat, more “stuff”,and less space in my roomy SUV. Why do kids come with so much stuff???

In the fall of 2015, we planned a trip to Apple Hill with a few friends. Instead of driving two cars, we decided to rent a van for the day so we could all ride together. My husband picked it up and brought it to the house, and we loaded up. I was blown away! The kids had so much room; they couldn’t touch each other and fight the whole road trip. We could fit our dear friends in the back and enjoy spending the driving time with them. The front passenger seat felt like a first class seat — so much leg room! I was able to tilt my seat into a super comfortable position without the person behind me feeling completely cramped. I fell in love, and my husband could tell I wouldn’t let it go. That road trip changed me, totally converting me to the mini van fan club!

A year later, almost to the day, we went shopping. We test drove a few different models, finally deciding on a 2012 Chrysler Town and Country. Oh the upgrades! Two DVD screens with surround sound and theater lighting, heated seats  (even the rear seats) and steering wheel, all the back seats were able to be stowed, creating a completely flat cargo area, navigation and back up cameras, and soft leather seats that could be easily wiped down. All the back doors and the lift gate can be opened from the front control panel or from the keys. The boys can get in and out by themselves, have enough room to not be in each other’s space which always caused stupid arguments, and they can watch movies with the wireless headphones while I listen to the music of MY CHOICE. It was love at first test drive! I named her Betty White and planned our first family road trip!

We have a ton of family in Las Vegas and make multiple trips every year, so for our family, this van was AMAZING! My boys have always been road warriors, because we have done these trips since they were newborns, but making this first trip on our van was eye opening. We could fit all of us, all our luggage, have a roomy spot for our fur baby Delilah (who used to be shoved in the trunk area with all our luggage and no space to lay down…horrible, I know!) and no one complained or fought or said they were bored every five minutes! We filled all the cup holders with various drinks, had snack bags to pass around, and a huge selection of movies to pass the 8-hour time. I actually got to relax, read my book, get a few naps, and not be asked for everything every five minutes! If I wasn’t sold before, after this first road trip, I was hooked for life!

My dad (Grandpa) was also very excited because he could now ride with us to various activities around town, or come with us on our Vegas trips and be able to visit my brother and his family. Another perk of the van is that I can help out with school pick up for our friends. I hated saying no because we didn’t have room for other kiddos. Now we have a carpool with my son’s best friend and his siblings, and everyone fits safely! I also volunteer to drive for fun girls trips. In January, I drove myself and a few ladies from my networking group to our leadership retreat in San Francisco: cost efficient and FUN!

A lot of people think that the mini van wipes out their “cool” factor, but I disagree! I love my mini van swagger, throwin on some old school gangster rap, and I am definitely not the “slow” mini van driver (ha ha!). I can’t wait until my boys are embarrassed of me and I can bust out the car dance parties and annoy them. Right now they think I am awesome, but I know the day is coming when my antics will make them cringe, and I honestly cannot wait!

I was so happy to pick up my van from the body shop yesterday, knowing we had another Vegas trip to drive, and I think the body shop guy thought I was a little crazy as I rubbed Betty White’s hood and told her how much I missed her. I have absolutely no regrets in choosing to drive a mini van. If you are completely against it like I was, or on the fence about the van club, I can say with no doubts that you will not regret it. Who else is totally in love with their van? Let’s start a local club and do some cruises!

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When I first thought of writing on this topic, I thought: We really don’t need another thing to divide us as moms, do we? So honestly — hear my heart in this post. This is written in the defense of the crazy sleep schedule mama, but also to encourage anyone who is needing advice in dealing with defeating, discouraging issues when it comes to infant/toddler sleep.

First off, I’m not an expert in this area. Literally, heavens no. So keep that in mind as you read my thoughts — I’m not here to bash anyone who doesn’t follow a sleep schedule. Trust me, I’ve had my share of times when I kind of want to trade lives with the mama that takes her 8-month-old out to fireworks past my kids’ bedtime! Do you hear me? I don’t want to cast judgment on anyone; I just want to share my heart, and how healthy sleep routines have helped to keep order in our family’s life amidst all the chaos that is raising kids.

So, for the first five to six months of my first son’s life, I felt very overwhelmed in the infant sleep department. I basically just went with the flow, took him out and about whenever, assuming he would fall asleep anytime, anywhere — because he’s a baby. Right? I honestly had no clue what his real sleep needs were. During this time, I was — I kid you not — a postpartum mess. Every time he would finally fall asleep, I couldn’t relax, because I feared he would wake up in eight minutes. And he almost always did.

The first several weeks of my son’s life, my husband and I would take turns pacing around the living room at night for a few hours with a wailing and overtired baby, because he had so much difficulty settling himself due to being so overtired from the day, having poor and infrequent naps that he truly needed for his growing body and developing brain. This whole overtired/under-tired thing was so confusing to figure out. Also, holy sleep props. We had some of those. (I’ll go over this near the end of my post, but essentially this is something your infant depends on to fall asleep.) I’ll just say, breast feeding was awful too, because I had trained him to need nursing to be able to fall asleep. (Yes, we totally did all the boob naps.)

But what was so difficult about this time was that I wasn’t getting a break. My mind wasn’t healthy. My body wasn’t getting rest. I was so confused by messages of “feed your baby on demand,” so I was essentially feeding him constantly, and well, that was painful. I know, you’re reading this and probably thinking — where were your mama instincts? Gosh, I don’t really know. I felt super insecure those first several months because it felt like my baby was generally pretty unhappy, and I was just trying to survive the day.

But I have good news. Around 6 months, things got a little easier. I picked up two books, both of which I would highly recommend if you’re struggling in the area of infant sleep, or if you’re expecting and are wanting to get some idea of what it might look like to attempt healthy sleep routines when your child arrives. The first is “On Becoming Babywise: Giving your Infant the Gift of Nighttime Sleep,” by Garry Ezzo & Robert Buckman. The second is “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child,” by Marc Weissbluth. I can honestly tell you, anytime my first son’s sleep was awful after learning the ropes of healthy sleep habits, it was usually just a matter of me needing to tweak his sleep schedule. Figuring out the correct wake times for him (at any given age) has usually been the culprit of our sleep issues. Also keep in mind, this totally excludes any sickness or interruption of sleep due to children trying to master new skills such as rolling over, language development, etc. The schedule totally almost goes out the window then.

Please note, this has just been my experience. It is definitely true that infant and toddler sleep can be complicated for many due to medical reasons, and more.

Fast foward to my second son, and it was the same scenario as my first, only much less intense. He still struggled with the witching hour those first few months and was quite fussy in the evenings. But it did get better with time. I understood that I had to follow his lead for a while. I didn’t expect him to pop out of the womb knowing how to sleep well. That wouldn’t be a fair expectation of an infant who’s completely dependent on his or her mother to thrive. By about 3.5 months of age, my second son was sleeping fairly independently, with consistent and predictable naps, and with about 12 hours of night time sleep. I really believe this is because we followed many of the recommended principles from both books I mentioned earlier.

Both of our children have thrived on sleep routines. Sleep is absolutely crucial for our children’s brains to be able to develop properly. Lack of sleep in infants and toddlers can result in many issues later down the line. I try not to judge moms for the choices they make in the area of their children’s sleep habits, but I also ask that I in return am not judged for choosing to follow a schedule. In defense of the crazy sleep schedule mama, here are some basic tips that have helped us to develop healthy sleep routines:

1. Do not even try implementing a schedule while your baby is a newborn. Of course this is dramatic, and I’m saying this loosely. Even at this age, babies need some predictability in routine. I think the goal at this age is to make sure your baby is getting full, adequate feedings, and that they don’t get overtired. Also, baby-wearing often helped us to get good, quality naps in those early weeks. Eventually, both of my kids stopped napping “on the go” well, and preferred sleeping in their cribs.
2. If your baby is still in the newborn phase, try swaddling. Because of the Moro reflex, infants can startle themselves awake if their arms aren’t securely (and safely) swaddled. You can also try sleep sacks of various kinds.
3. Eat. Play. Sleep. If nothing else, follow this routine! Try to avoid feeding your baby to sleep. This would be a good time to stop using bottles or nursing as a sleep prop, or as an aid to help your baby fall asleep.
4. White noise. So much yes. Both of our kids were soothed by white noise. You can get an inexpensive white noise machine at Target or off of Amazon.
5. Black out curtains. This is also huge for us. I can’t sleep in the daylight! Neither can my kids, apparently. I’m embarrassed to tell you this, but once, when we were desperate for darkness in the nursery (and at the time couldn’t afford buying black out curtains), we taped foil to the windows. I’m just saying…it worked incredibly well.
6. Play with wake times. At different ages, infants and toddlers will need different wake times during the day. Try to figure out what those times are, and stick with them consistently until you see any reason to change what you’re doing. If you’re like I was and have zero clue about wake times, check out the Babywise book! And there are plenty of sample schedules of various ages on www.babywisemom.com. She’s an incredible resource for healthy sleep routines also.
7. Pick a consistent daily wake time and bed time. This is unfortunately kind of key. This was sad for me in the beginning. I don’t want to miss that family dinner out, or that one event that starts at 7 p.m. But I’m telling you, this is worth it for your child and your family. Bedtime for infants and toddlers is probably best in the 7 p.m. – 8:30 p.m. range, depending on their age and what works best for your family’s needs and schedule.
8. Chat with a certified sleep consultant. This can be expensive, but there’s no price tag on having peace of mind that your child is getting solid rest, and that you can have some time to yourself each evening! Oftentimes, you can schedule a free call for your first session.

I think that covers it. Don’t feel guilty if you are desiring quality rest for your child, yourself, and for your family! There are so many reasons why it’s worth it to create healthy sleep routines.

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Dear Daughter:

On a recent weekend, I sat down for a minute on the couch and started browsing social media. That’s when you looked over from watching TV (which you had been doing for at least an hour) and said, “Mom! You are so LAZY! It’s almost dinner time! What are you going to cook for dinner?”

You may have noticed the look I gave you was a mixture of shock and awe, followed by a lot of anger.

This was during a week when I started work no later than 6am most days. Then, after getting done with work around 5pm, I’d go and immediately start making dinner. After dinner, I’d go read to you and your brother and then tuck you into bed before collapsing myself. It was a week that exhausted me to the bone. And on my Saturday, before you had the nerve to say that comment, I had not only done some work for my day job, but I also managed to do 5 loads of laundry, shuttle kids to and from different playdates with friends, and carve out a bit of “me time,” which involved 2 hours of kicking my own rear end at the gym.

It struck me that you called me lazy.

I really felt like in your mind, the emotional labor of being a mother just didn’t register.

I felt like you would NEVER call your father lazy, even though most days he doesn’t even wake up until I have clocked in several hours of work and he doesn’t come home from work until dinner is on the table, so he just has to pull up a chair and pour a glass of wine. He likes to ride his bike to work, so he also doesn’t shuttle kids to any activities.

Yet I’m the lazy one.

You may have thought I overreacted. You may have thought the multiple “conversations” we had later that day about me being “lazy” was me overreacting, but I want to drive it into your head that most days I work myself past the point of exhaustion trying to hold down a full-time job and be a mother to two growing humans. My brain never gets to shut off, and when I sat on the couch to dare to look at social media, I was actually reading posts from the parent Facebook group for your school.

I hope that by the time you become a mother, that you’ll be able to split more of this emotional labor with your partner. But the truth is that so many women in my generation are doing the heavy lifting when it comes to parenthood. It’s me that volunteers at school, does the back to school shopping, talks to the teachers, arranges after-school activities, arranges your activities for the entire summer, takes you to the doctor, drives carpools and cooks all the damn meals. My God, there are so many meals to fix for a family. It’s a job that has to be done multiple times a day.

So when you later said, “No offense, Mom, but your dinners this summer have been a bit lacking,” I may have come a bit unglued. Now that you’re 12, it’s time for you to step up and help more not only around the house, but with the endless cycle of meals. Don’t worry, your brother will be helping just as much. He doesn’t do as much now just because he’s younger, but I’m going to do my best for his future wife to ensure that gender stereotyping of household roles won’t persist.

I love you, dear daughter. But I swear if you EVER call me LAZY again, you will inherit more chores than you know what to do with. I want you to realize that I put all of my efforts into being a good mother, but sometimes I DESERVE DAMN BREAK and I will take that break without any judgment from you.

And no, you can’t shame me for cursing in this letter, either.

With Love,

Mom

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I *heart* creative bento box lunches. But just so I don’t scare anyone off, I’m not talking about cutting faces out of seaweed or dying pasta to make hair. I admire those who do, but I know myself and my son — I’m not that dedicated, and he isn’t going to eat seaweed or anything touched by seaweed. 🤷

What I am talking about is fun, fast, and feasible lunches that should take no more than 10 minutes to assemble in the morning or the night before. I’m in no way an expert and only have the appearance of one because of these awesome and affordable tools: 

1. The standard three-compartment lunchbox is a good choice and our go-to for cold lunches. For lunches that need to be reheated (Ian’s previous preschool has a microwave in the classroom), I recommend a tiered one, because it is easier for the teachers to slide a tray into the microwave without worrying about removing the fruits or other sides.

2. The lunch bag is a little trickier, because you’ll need one that stays in the same orientation for carrying and opening; after all, the other kind (carried upright then laid flat to open) will just undo all the cuteness.

3. Cookie cutters are the superstars of bento-making. Ian loves these animal faces sandwich cutters and asks for “yummy Peppa Pig sandwiches,” which is both hilarious and horrifying.

4. Silicone cups make organizing a breeze and add a splash of color, especially if your kid (like mine) isn’t too fond of green things other than green grapes.

5. Shape cutters and stamps can be used for sandwiches or sides.

To set both of us up for success, I pack Ian’s lunches with things I know he’ll eat like pb&j sandwiches, deli meat, hard-boiled eggs, cheese, bars, crackers, and of course, all the fruit! Honestly, prepping the fruit is the most time consuming part, mostly because I’m super paranoid about choking — so I’m still halving Ian’s grapes and cherries. But if you have older kiddos, it’ll be a much faster process for you.

Putting the bento boxes together requires a bit of creativity, and sometimes, that’s just asking too much on hectic mornings. I find that choosing a theme and sticking to it for a week/month can help reduce some of that stress. For example, I did an alphabet series when I first started. Most of them were pretty easy, thanks to my trusty cookie cutters and shape cutters, but I also picked up these animal cookie stamps and Mickey Mouse cookie cutters to make my life easier. I had to get creative with some of the letters and used an X-Acto knife and stainless steel straws for some of the details (especially for the Y is for YouTube lunch). Fruit strips really came in handy for this project, they were easy to cut and arrange with the right amount of stickiness that they actually stayed in place. Plus, Ian loved having a sweet treat in his lunch.

You can also try to cut shapes/designs with scissors. I’ve had some mixed results with that approach:

The pirate turned out pretty great but I had to tell Ian that it was a fox (on the left) and a shark (on bottom right). 🤦

I’ve been making bento boxes for about two years now, and they have really helped Ian’s transition from home to preschool, then from his first preschool to his current one and, I hope, from preschool to kindergarten next year.

If you’re a fellow bento-maker, what are your favorite tools? If you’re not but want to give it a try, please do, and let me know how it goes!

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