I have succumbed to the mercy of my calendar. And not just any calendar, but ALL calendars. Being organized is a skill that becomes more and more imperative as I grow older and my family becomes more needy (ahem…involved). I truly feel that most days, I am the master scheduler for everyone in my family— including the dog and my own mother, as she helps with childcare. Is this normal?
Each night before we go to bed, my husband and I have what we affectionately call a “calendar meeting.” Romantic, right? Maybe not, but it’s imperative. We review the next day’s upcoming events beyond our typical work day. Since we are both educators, we have various other after-school commitments ourselves like meetings, appointments, coaching responsibilities, etc. Our son is in kindergarten and already attends a before-school program, so he needs to be picked up by 3 each day; and our daughter, who is 3, attends a preschool three days a week, and is with my mom two days a week. Every day seems like a new challenge. And the first and foremost rule of this managerial game is “if it’s not already in the calendar, it can’t happen.” Ha, yeah right!
This calendaring fun has been a work in progress. When we first got married, we seemed to have all the free time the world, rarely ever even talking about our schedules or syncing our iPhone calendars. But now, after eight years of marriage, two kids, and so many activities and commitments between us all, if we don’t check and pre-plan everything, it could ruin an entire day! And it’s not just my husband’s and my schedule to consider. I am constantly managing my son’s activities, school events, practices, and typical medical appointments, and then basically doubling that with my daughter; now throw in my mom’s schedule as well, and really my job title should be “personal calendar manager” or “scheduling queen.” Most days, I feel as though I barely know what I am supposed to being doing or when, let alone coordinating four other humans’ lives as well.
It’s a complicated puzzle for sure. I have even gone as far as using several versions of calendars all at once to try to keep things straight between work appointments/meetings, personal appointments, school/sports activities, and then just anything else that falls in between. This is both hyper-organized, but also severely dangerous because if I don’t cross coordinate them all in to one master calendar (thank God for iPhone calendars and syncing) then everyone’s day is out of whack and probably includes late or missed appointments.
Recently, I have yearned for simplicity to ease this burden, though I realize this is mostly self-created. But at the expense of not being present, limiting opportunities and experiences for my family, and simply just having FOMO — I bow down to the calendar and all that life will bring to my schedule.
So who wants to meet for tea or wine? I’m sure I have plenty of time — just let me just check my calendar. Or rather, calendars!
About Crystal M. Edwards:
Crystal is a mom of two and is a former teacher of 10 years. She is currently Dean of Students and has been married for seven years.
